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What a great birthday I was having. It turned out that the best was yet to come, Alun was playing musical chairs. It started off with 4 chairs, my mouth and my pussy as safe. Once everyone had got into the swing of things when the music had stopped everyone not fucking me had to fight for a chair. If they did not get one they had to sit it out until the end. Alun was good on the HiFi, he had them going for ages and a few seconds and it was good fun. Then I got a whisper from Alun who said that the fun was just about to start and the game had been won. It turned out the winner was the one who was left with his dick in my pussy. So what was his present I wondered, not for long because I soon found out. He withdrew from my pussy and then moved it to my other hole and slowly pushed it forward. Pop in went the head then oooh pain and pleasure ripped through my body as another organism raced through my body. He began to push in and out faster and faster. I still had a cock in my mouth too,. I'd have to learn how to be myself, which was a weird thought. I wonder if I could practice somehow. Maybe go out to bars and see what it felt like to 'be myself', I guess.Ugh.Not long after I found out about masturbation, and then the internet, I discovered stories describing BDSM relationships, and it resonated somewhere deep inside of me. I wanted to be a dominant. I wanted control. But that inequality was so alien to how I was raised that I felt tremendous guilt about it and never told a soul about my desires. The guilt, however great, never stopped me from fantasizing. If I was going to turn over a new leaf, and try to be open and truly honest with my potential partners, I needed to acknowledge this part of me. Let it out, and learn how to engage it.Suddenly I realized what was so terrifying about being myself. I was petrified about letting the dominant part of me out. What if they thought I was sick. What if they laughed. Worst of all, what if I hurt somebody? Jesus. That would.
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